Blog I Don’t Love You Anymore
She could tell that something was going on.
At least he was honest when he told her that he was done with their marriage. He wanted to be free to do what he wanted, when he wanted. She was crushed, and a friend referred her to the Free Her site. She came in wanting answers on how to get him back, but first she had to deal with the brutal statement that he’d made: “I don’t love you anymore.” Those words sent her into a dark place. Being married to him had been one of her greatest joys. He was a great father to their kids and a strong provider, he loved her extended family and fit right in, and he was a strong member of the community and respected for his work and character. And then this.
She thought about the words all the time. The Save Love Experience exposed her monster of fear, the monster that had consumed her. A couple of times she was so overwhelmed by it that she wasn’t able to go into work. Medication from a doctor helped calm her down, but it didn’t deal with the underlying issue. She loved the idea of focusing on LUV: Living the truth, Unconditionally and Very intentionally. She heard the words he said, and she could also hear what his heart was saying. She knew, when she was really quiet, that he wasn’t done yet. The other woman was an experiment in seeking happiness. She had no children, was almost retired, and just enjoyed having him come to her place. She cooked for him and showered him with praise and sexual attention, but he still wanted his marriage, his family, his community. He was stuck between two worlds. One that was happy and selfish, and the other that was sad and required him to be selfless. When she found stillness, she saw the struggle.
She wanted to be angry. She wanted to be full of hate and despise him. The kids were really hurt and confused by what their dad was doing. The eldest daughter confronted him, but that only seemed to drive him further away. She asked her daughter to go through the Crisis program, too, and it dramatically helped the daughter, helping her tap into the grief that was underneath the anger. She loved letting the LUV flow through her, and the grief that she exhaled kept her healthy and away from bitterness. This new expression attracted her husband back to the home, and he began to spend more time there, away from the other woman.
The other woman soon became desperate and needy. She could feel him slipping away. She tried to give him more sex and more attention but he felt the neediness and that scared him. She was just like his wife, only she didn’t come with children, family, and the community. It would be just the two of them, and that felt lonely.
She smiled at herself in the mirror. She was a new person. She was free from his brutal words. They still hurt, but they didn’t dominate her, so she became able to make decisions based on the truth and not on her fear. Her strength affected her children and even him. He was impressed with her and told her so. Her character was shining like it hadn’t shined in a long time. Good people were drawn to her, and she helped other women who were in a similar situation. It was good to be free.
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